Hey, hey, It’s Depression

While my meds work pretty well, they are not magic. And every once in awhile, the waves of my bipolar disorder swamp the boat of my mood stabilizer, as it were.

And that happened three days ago, and it derailed my writing momentum pretty hard, as well as my workout, which I had managed not to miss a single one of (although I did day shift a few times) until this week.

I was about 1100 words into a teenage romance mystery (Hi, Chris!) and it’s still sitting there on my screen, in the same spot.

The good part is I think the tide is mostly on its way out again. I hope so, because it was rough this time. It’s been a long time since it took me off my feet.

I managed to keep the crops watered, my head on, and wasn’t an asshole to my wife, so really, best case scenario, given the realities. And I didn’t eat that box of donuts I almost went out and bought Friday morning.

4 thoughts on “Hey, hey, It’s Depression

  1. You got this… you can do it! We all have some bad times and I am glad that you were able to recognize what was happening and NOT eat those donuts! Even better you were kind to your lovely bride! Now let’s get on it and send out that love story! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m glad it hit and didn’t stay for a loooooong time like it did in the past. Does having the garden and other things with a bit of a built-in routine help some? I remember a Vlogbrothers video from a year or two ago, where John Green was just getting into gardening…and it was like, “I planted peas, and barely got any, but LOOK–A PEA!!!” And how it helps him.

    Shit, if it’s any consolation, I dropped off the writing challenge in the middle of the week. I wouldn’t say I got depressed, but the current job contract is all over the place and I got hit with a big, “I don’t like this at all…I wish I could focus on the things I like, that actually make me happy.” And got in a bit of a funk for a couple days.

    So here’s to a good week ahead. My day began with a BS meeting right at the start that has people like, “We need to schedule more meetings,” and me rejecting them with responses of, “You can have me attend meetings or you can have me write. Your choice, but if the answer is meetings, know these deadlines will not be made…”

    I know even writing fiction full time comes with its own BS, but still…

    (Really, we all just need a massive pile of money to buy a bunch of land up in the mountains and have a geek compound…just this nice little plot with a public space, and then all our geeky buds around that like petals on a flower or something.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It does help to have things you can’t walk away from. It’s been so hot that the heat would kill the crops if they didn’t get regular watering, so I got that done. Having a thing where something living relies on you makes it easier to move sometimes.

    Mostly frustrated because the writing was going really well and then I woke up one morning and was just “Bah, fuck everything!”

    But I worked out today, and tomorrow I will pick up the story of Chase Brown, teenage detective, and his hunt for Zora Williams’s written science fair report.


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